Religious folks are certain; they believe
Snakes talk (and asses too); know, in a pinch,
I’d whistle up a nation from the East
To punish those convinced that life’s a cinch.
But with Amalekites in short supply,
I’m sometimes forced to improvise the means
To keep My folks in line. So, when they try
For independence, yearn for self-esteem,
I send earthquakes, tsunamis, raging storms—
(And, just to make My point, some avian flu)—
Bust up the roads, impede, multiply harm
‘Til Congregations understand My view.
I grin when parents, without irony,
For one child spared, cry out their thanks to Me.
10/23/05
Well, the famous talking serpent (who originally had legs, though it doesn’t say how many) appears in Genesis 3:1-5. Balaam’s less famous talking ass appears in Numbers 22:28-30, where she gets into a rather testy dispute with her owner. The Amalekites, you will remember turn up for the first time in Exodus 17:8—but they keep reappearing, and it’s always bad news for Israel. God used other tribes as well to punish his stiff-necked people—gave them into the hands of the Mesopotamians (modern Iraq, by the way), or the Midianites, or the Philistines, or, sometimes, just plain plunderers (it’s all in that old book, particularly in Judges).